Forgiving Alma

This is probably one of those obvious little things that everyone (for all I know) may have already noticed.  But it really hit me today, and it was just a great big aha! moment.  So, I feel like sharing it, because I thought it was worthwhile.

Anyway, this has to do with Alma the Younger, from the Book of Mormon.  You know, that guy the Book of Alma is named after (which, it turns out, happens to be the longest section of the entire Book of Mormon at 63 chapters).  I like to think of him as one of the most amazing people in the scriptures--a sort of hero.  He was the chief judge over all the people of Nephi, as well as high priest over the whole Church.  He sacrificed his position in the government to go out and preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ, because that's how important the Lord was to him.  His sermons on topics such as faith, repentance, and the Plan of Salvation are well-loved and relatable, and continue to be frequently quoted in the Church today.  Alma's just a spiritual rock star.  

Yet at one point, Alma couldn't have been farther from any of those things.  He undoubtedly came from a good home, and had been taught the right way to live--after all, his dad was the prophet, and had first organized the Church among the Nephites.  I'm sure Alma had awesome spiritual support growing up.  But he was wicked.  As in, completely-try-to-destroy-the-Church wicked.  The scriptures don't tell us exactly how long this was going on, but the footnote in Mosiah 27 suggests a possible time frame of about eight years.  Even factoring some time at the end of the chapter for Alma's missionary work post-conversion, I personally find it reasonable to imagine that his phase of wickedness would easily have occupied several years of his life.  

Here's what hit me, though: 

The record we have of Alma's righteous service is incredibly detailed--I mean, look at how thick his book is. But in the narrative of the years of his life before that ever happened... we only have three verses and one line:

Now the sons of Mosiah were numbered among the unbelievers; and also one of the sons of Alma was numbered among them, he being called Alma, after his father; nevertheless, he became a very wicked and an idolatrous man. And he was a man of many words, and did speak much flattery to the people; therefore he led many of the people to do after the manner of his iniquities. 

And he became a great hinderment to the prosperity of the church of God; stealing away the hearts of the people; causing much dissension among the people; giving a chance for the enemy of God to exercise his power over them. 

And now it came to pass that while he was going about to destroy the church of God, for he did go about secretly with the sons of Mosiah seeking to destroy the church, and to lead astray the people of the Lord, contrary to the commandments of God, or even the king— 

And as I said unto you, as they were going about rebelling against God, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto them; and he descended as it were in a cloud; and he spake as it were with a voice of thunder, which caused the earth to shake upon which they stood....  (Mosiah 27:8-11)

That's it.  Later on, in Alma 36, Alma relates the story again to his son.  But he doesn't include any particular detail there, either, of his actions before he was converted.  

The focus is on what happened after he repented.

Read Mosiah 27 and Alma 36.  If you don't have a Book of Mormon handy, you can read those chapters here and here.  Pay attention to how much of each chapter is devoted to testifying of the cleansing power of Christ's Atonement.  You get a few verses mentioning what happened in the past... but then the rest of it is about the change, the healing, the cleansing that happened, and the kind of man Alma became after that.  And then we get the whole rest of the Book of Alma, filled with his own Gospel teachings and stories of his own ministry and the people he touched.  Alma the Younger became the Lord's prophet.

Do you think some people might have struggled to forgive Alma after he was first converted?  I might believe so.  Were there some who might have chosen not to trust him because of what he had done?  I wouldn't be surprised if there were.  Alma did some terrible things.  

But Alma also sincerely repented.  Why don't we have a detailed record of the mistakes he made?  Because they just don't matter anymore.  What truly matters is what he did, what he became, after he turned away from his former life of sin.  

Well, that's fine.  We all know how great Alma was.  But do we always see the modern Almas that surround us?  When we're hurt, offended, disgusted, inconvenienced, or otherwise unimpressed by someone else, do we allow that person to change?  Do we allow them to repent and make things right?  

If someone has committed some great sin, do we deny them the blood of Christ for which they so desperately thirst?  Do we deny them the forgiveness the Lord has already promised if they would repent?  

Do we do that to ourselves?  

The story of Alma teaches us that there is nothing we can do that can ever disqualify us from the healing power of the Atonement.  The scriptures are full of vile sinners... who were forgiven.  Consider that person who may have offended or hurt you, and is doing their sincere best to turn it around.  They could be a Paul, if you gave them the chance.  They could be an Ammon, or an Aaron, or an Omner, or a Himni.  They could even be an Alma.  You could be, too.    

  

  

The Lord's University

I can't describe how quickly the time has flown.  It was four years ago this morning that I first entered the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah--the first of many unforgettable experiences that would fill the two years I would eventually serve where the Lord had called me.



As I look back on the four years that have passed since then, I am amazed at everything that has happened in my life, and how very much has changed.  With everyone I've met and grown close to, everywhere I've been, and everything I've done and become, I could very well write volumes.  Perhaps another time, soon, I may dedicate a blog post to reflecting on where the path of life has taken me so far. 

But tonight I just want to take a moment and remember the MTC, and what it taught me.  Never have I had another experience quite like it.

In a very real sense, the MTC was like a spiritual "boot camp."  Every day was strictly regimented; every single hour had a specific purpose.  We were trained in a foreign language and how to teach the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Morning, day, and night were devoted to the study of scriptures and the betterment of ourselves and our relationships.  And just as much emphasis was placed on feeding our spirits as there was on feeding and caring for our bodies; so we ate very well and exercised every day, too.  There were also regular opportunities for service in the cleaning and maintenance of the MTC buildings and grounds.  Really, I can't even paint a detailed enough picture to show what it was like... but everything we did there built character and testimony.  The Spirit of the Lord was there in great abundance.  It was very much the Lord's University, or His own little city upon the earth.  The closest thing I can relate it to is actually living in the temple.

I loved it.

I won't take too much time tonight, because it is late and I am very tired.  So, I'm just going to say this quickly, and you can think about it.  These are things I experienced in the MTC that strengthened me and that I want to remain in my life:  daily, diligent scripture study; strict obedience to high Gospel standards; adherence to a schedule that facilitates the study and application of truth; opportunities to grow through service; fine-tuning the spirit by caring for the body; the frequent bearing of testimony; practice in the Spanish language; regular temple attendance; appreciation and respect for the counsel of wise leaders; and the promotion of a healthy, balanced life by keeping oneself productive physically, spiritually, socially, and intellectually.  Through all of these things I have found true happiness, and I would invite you to try any of them.   

One last thought:

Jeffrey R. Holland gave an excellent talk last night on living righteously in the 21st century.  What struck me the most in his remarks was near the end, when he mentioned how when the Savior comes again, he wants to be caught living the Gospel.  I just love the way he put that, and it's what I want, too.  When Christ returns, we're all going to be in the middle of things.  He's not going to politely wait for us to finish what we're doing.  So, I want to make sure He finds me living the Gospel.

Want to be happy?  That's how it's going to happen.  I guarantee it. 

To write

Well, hello there, friends!  When I opened up my blog tonight, I had to blow a little dust off of it.  That's my fault, I suppose.

The thing is, I really don't know what to blog about these days.  I'm still very much an optimist, and want to spread the message of happiness far and wide--which was the aim of this blog before.  But I don't feel like I can really add much to what I've already shared on the subject (in other words, this is a plug for the blog archives.  Check them out!).  I don't necessarily want to turn this into a generic, theme-less blog.  But what I want the most now... is to just write.  I'll let the topics come as they may; I just want to write.

We'll probably get caught up with time, but I will at least mention that my career path has changed (again) since the last time I talked about it here.  There are still important decisions to be made, experiments to try, time to pass... but right now I've got it narrowed down to public relations or journalism.  The way I see it, though, whatever career I choose, there will be a lot of writing involved.  So if I want to excel in my life's work, I need to practice.

Every day.

I grew up with a passion for writing.  Ever since I could hold a pencil, I've loved crafting stories, finding the best ways to say things, just playing with words.  In so many ways, it's shaped who I am.  But life gets busy; and especially these last few years, life has been busy.  I simply haven't had the time or the energy to be a writer.  I lost my passion for a while.

But, deep down...

I'm a writer.

I have always been a writer.

And I always want to be a writer.

I have some very special people to thank for helping me find my passion again.  I consider myself so blessed to have such a wonderful girlfriend who happens to be a writer, too (and a very good writer, at that.  Also, I want to make her blush when she reads this.).  We have great writer friends, in whose company we share writing samples, exchange feedback, and offer encouragement to one another.  I hope they know how much I appreciate them.  They have been instrumental in awakening the passion once more in me to write, and to write every day.  And I think they would be proud of that.

So, what does this mean for the blog?

Beats me.  I don't plan on writing here every day.  My goal is just to write every day.  This blog will likely see more action because of that, but I also have a novel that I'm working on.  I want a variety of places where I can practice... so, keep an eye on my other, new blog, too!  I call it The Zebra and the Apple, and I'll be using it as a place to put the (somewhat crazy) fairy tales I write.  With two blogs, I should have enough to keep things alive and entertaining for you, dear readers.

It's good to be back.

Thanks to Rachel for the picture!

Skate on

I was driving down the street yesterday, and a man was rollerblading up the sidewalk, carrying a couple bags of groceries.  I watched as he began to wobble, then attempt to correct his position, then finally lose control entirely.  He landed in the road--in the lane where I happened to be driving.  Thankfully I'd been paying attention, so I was able to stop my car in time.  He was sprawled out pretty good, but there were no observable injuries.

Someday I want a car with power windows, so I can talk to people outside without struggling to lean over and roll the passenger window down.  That would have been so nice yesterday; I wanted to ask the guy if he was alright, or if he needed help, or anything.  But the traffic was starting to come up behind me, so all I could do was smile and wave as I at least stayed put for long enough to make sure he could move safely out of the way.

He lifted his head, looked up at me . . . and smiled and waved back.  It was the type of good-natured smile that said, "Well, that was interesting!  Let's try this again."  He picked himself up, gathered his groceries. 

And skated on.

Skate on, my friends.

Day 26: "The happy guy"

Day 26:  What people notice about you


It's pretty interesting how consistent this one is.  The majority of compliments I receive go along the lines of, "You're always in such a good mood," "You never get angry," "You always look on the bright side of things," etc.  So, I can safely say that happiness is what people notice about me.  Not to brag, or anything; I'm just a happy person, and I'm glad that's what others see in me. 

I have the Lord to thank for that.  Really.  Christ is an optimist; every one of His teachings is meant to give hope, strengthen faith, and inspire action.  I'm not perfect, but I try to live those teachings, and I have seen the impact it has made in my life.  With faith, I know I can overcome whatever trials it is my lot to face.  So, I don't worry about things; I just press on and do my best, even when it's a step in the dark.  I try, and I learn, and I understand that I'm not going to get everything right the first time.  And I'm fine with that because I know there's a Plan and God doesn't fail.  He gives me peace and strength, and it feels awesome, so why wouldn't I be happy?  It can be easy to get bogged down in the disappointments and confusion of life, but my eye is on moving forward.  That's my secret: if things are hard, and I can't see the end from the beginning, I just move forward.  It makes smiling quite easy.


And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it.  --Mosiah 2:41 

Day 25: The good life

Day 25:  What do you want your future to be like?


Strong, love-filled marriage.  Happy, well-mannered kids.  A nice, modest home in the suburbs, with friendly neighbors; a place where the Spirit can truly reside.  I want to enjoy and be doing well in my career, making enough money so my family can live comfortably, but still be able to leave my work at work and be home every night--and by "being home," I mean actual quality, invested time, not just being present.  It doesn't matter to me what my Church calling will be; I just want to be a good father and a dependable home teacher--the kind of man the Lord can trust.  In so many words, all I want is to be a family man, a good neighbor, and a faithful servant.

Day 20: Going out like a Texan

Day 20:  Death row meal


It would go something like this:

• Smoked brisket (I shouldn't have to specify, but I might not be in a Texan prison), drenched in Rudy's barbecue sauce
• Spicy sausage
• Cream corn
• Baked beans
• White bread (nothing fancy--just plain old Wonderbread-type stuff)
• Pickle spears
• Banana pudding
• Buttermilk pie
• Smoked pecan pie
• Ice cold, fresh-squeezed lemonade

It's not that these are my favorite foods (though many are among my favorites).  For me, this type of meal is symbolic of one of the most meaningful, Christ-centered periods of my life.  Sitting on death row would be a dark time, to be sure, so I'd want to be reminded of a time when great light overpowered all darkness, when I went about doing good (because I would have had to not be doing good to end up on death row).  That would be the most comforting thing to me as I faced execution.

Day 18: Story of my life

Day 18:  A quote you love


"After all is said and done, more is said than done."  --Aesop

Day 17: My teachers

Day 17: Talk about your parents


There's no way this post can do justice to my parents.  Nothing I write could, but it also doesn't help that it's almost midnight and I'm dead tired--only up still because I'm waiting for the laundry (that seems to happen a lot, I now realize).  So, a very brief, very inadequate tribute.

My dad's passion is land surveying, which he does very well teaching at a local college.  My mom has a wonderful career as a translator.  Dad found the Church when he was eighteen and served a mission to Belgium shortly thereafter.  Mom's ancestors came across the Plains, and she served a mission to Uruguay.  Both have inspiring testimonies, which helped kindle mine at a young age.  Neither are strangers to trials, which I suppose is one reason why they are such strong, wise people.  I've learned a lot from their experiences.

Dad taught me how to play chess.
Mom introduced me to the piano.
Both sang to me as a child.  Some of my favorite hymns are their favorites.
Mom edited my school papers and taught me proper grammar.
Dad taught me history and geography.
Both taught me to be well-rounded and open to considering all ideas fairly.
Dad took me on adventures wherever his work and errands directed him.
Mom encouraged me to be imaginative and social.
Both made sure I got to not only see the world, but learn from it.  Vacations were always cultural experiences.

Mom and Dad have raised me to work hard, play hard, and never settle for ordinary.  They have taught me by example to love learning and to appreciate the simple things life has to offer.  They have encouraged me to create and to laugh and to think.  Who I am is, in so many ways, a result of who they are.  And I can't imagine where I'd be without them. 

Day 13: The great story

Day 13:  What are the 10 most significant events in your life?

1. My baptism.  That's pretty much when everything really started.
2. The choice at age ten to learn to play the violin.  So much of my life has been shaped by the friendships gained from playing in an orchestra.  
3. Every Priesthood ordination has been monumental, but for me it was especially so when I became a deacon.  It was on my twelfth birthday, and it was also the mission farewell of my older brother, who ordained me.  Holding the Priesthood has been such a huge blessing in my life.  
4. The youth conference when I decided at age thirteen that I wanted to serve a mission.  Many of the most important decisions of my life have been made around a campfire.
5. Reaching the rank of Eagle Scout at fourteen.  I considered myself something of a "runt of the litter," and worked very hard for every merit badge and rank advancement I achieved.  I gained so much from this--especially the knowledge that I could do hard things.  Victory was so sweet, and I got to share the Court of Honor with my best friend from childhood.
6. The Fifty-Miler.  We went on this hike every summer, and that's where I was tested the most physically (and in some cases mentally).  Having made this journey successfully, and more than once, other trials that come up now just seem so small because I know I've dealt with harder things and I've come out okay.  The Fifty truly was where boys became men, and its influence in my life continues to this day.
7. Receiving--and recognizing--an answer to prayer at age fifteen concerning the truth of the Book of Mormon.  It could have its own blog post if I wanted to give it one (actually I go into it a little here in an interview hosted by a fellow blogger), but long story very short, it changed my life.  I may have been devoted to the Church before, but now I could finally say I was devoted to Christ.  
8. Graduating high school.  Not because of the diploma, but because of how my entire world changed afterward.  As I entered the life of college and employment, my capacity for adventure increased as well and I have so many memories (and lessons learned) to enjoy because of it.
9. My mission.  In this I am also including my ordination to the office of elder, receiving my mission call, going through the temple, and all the preparation that went into my departure, because all of those things happened when they did as part of the process to actually go on the mission.  It would take much more than a blog post to express just how very, very much my mission has impacted my life.  
10. Coming home from my mission.  Everything before was more like a "prologue" to my life; now is the actual story, and it began that August day when I stepped off a plane in Salt Lake City.   

Day 12: Shuffle

Day 12:  Put your iPod on shuffle and list the first 10 songs.

1. Dancing Mad -- Nobuo Uematsu
2. Prelude (Distant Worlds version) -- Nobuo Uematsu (It's okay, Lydia--I got a repeat, too.  Nobuo Uematsu might keep showing up, because he's my favorite musician ever.)
3. Ye Elders of Israel -- Mormon Tabernacle Choir
4. Hoodoo -- Muse
5. Melodies of Life (FFIX Piano Collections) -- Nobuo Uematsu
6. Don of the Slums -- Nobuo Uematsu (surprise!)
7. Dan y Dwr -- Enya
8. The Last Rose of Summer -- Celtic Woman
9. Variations on a Theme from Pachelbel's Canon in D -- David Lanz
10. You're My Best Friend -- Queen

You can learn a lot about a person by going through their iPod.

Day 11: Hooked on books

Day 11:  Your favorite store

This is another one that really took some thought.  There are a number of stores I love (and give probably way too much of my money--I'm looking at you, Day Murray).  But I think the winner would have to be a store I can go to frequently, yet which still satisfies me even when I purchase nothing.

And that would have to be Barnes & Noble.  I love that place.  

For me, it's more than a bookstore.  Sometimes if I'm stressed out and only have a little bit of time to get away, I go there and get lost.  It's also a great place to go with friends, because there's so much interesting stuff to find and talk about.  

And on the occasional visit when I do buy something, I always get a good deal.  Quite often, they'll email me a coupon for 15% off a purchase, and sometimes even more.  They'll also frequently have a sale on classics: buy two, get one free (and I am in love with the uniform design of their Classics Series).  I rarely have to pay full price, so I keep going back. 

But before this turns into an advertisement, here's my favorite cat video.

Day 9: Tears

Day 9:  A song that makes you cry (or nearly)


I had to clear my YouTube history after searching for this video.  I feel dirty posting it.  But I can't resist.





This song makes me cry because there are people who actually consider it music.  These days, popular song lyrics consist of "Baby, baby, baby, ohhh," on repeat.  May God have mercy on our souls.   

Still not clean.  I can't get it off me.

I'll hide my YouTube sins by posting an additional two pieces of music--both very beautiful, and which do quite well at tugging at my heartstrings.

Day 6: Roswell

Day 6:  What’s an inside joke you have with someone?


The route of our family trip one summer took us through Roswell, New Mexico.  I forget if we were coming out of a museum or a restaurant, but as we were turning back onto the road, we drove over a really high curb and it shook up the car pretty good.  We pulled back into the parking lot to check for damage--I don't recall there being any to speak of--and continued on our way.

Ever since then, whenever any of us drives over a curb, we refer to it as a "Roswell."  

Day 5: Before I shone

Day 5:  Something you can’t seem to get over


I can't get over how much hair I used to have.  If there weren't pictures, I would never believe it.

Day 3: Solitude

Day 3:  Weird things you do when you’re alone


This was a tough one to figure out; what I do when I'm alone is pretty much what I do when I'm not alone.  I'm consistent like that.

I do talk to myself, though.  I recognize that I'm not the only one who does that (turns out it's actually quite common), but especially in the car, I'll have real conversations with myself in which I as the speaker am not me, but am the concept of what another, wiser person might be in the passenger seat.  The real me remains silent, unless answering a direct question.  "Not me"--the speaker--normally takes on the role of coach/teacher.  "How do you think that went?"  "What did you do well?  What can you do better next time?"  "Do you see what happened there?  How do we avoid that?"  Etc.  

Also, if no one else is around at home, I will often sit down at the piano, lower my head as if asleep (sometimes curling down almost all the way to the keyboard), close my eyes, and enter a sort of "trance" state as I randomly hit keys that eventually become a coherent (sometimes epic) tune.  It's very hard to wake up.

That's probably the weirdest thing I do.

On a related note, here's a quote from Dieter F. Uchtdorf:

Pause for a moment and check where your own heart and thoughts are. Are you focused on the things that matter most? How you spend your quiet time may provide a valuable clue.

(You can read the rest of his talk here; it's one of my favorites.)

Day 2: Feels so good

Day 2:  A photo that makes you happy


Found this on my mission.  I can't not be happy when I look at it.

Day 1: Unexpected things

Lydia's doing a 30-day challenge again on her blog, and I figured, Hey, why not join in?  Life is busy so I can't promise I'll do all thirty days, but I'll do what I can.  In any case, this should be fun.


Day 1:  10 things about you people don’t really expect


1.  After a few years of piano lessons, I wanted to quit.

2.  Because I'm LDS and also from Utah, people frequently assume I'm politically conservative.  Actually, I'm moderate.

3.  I'm not really that big into movies.  There are a few that I love to sit down and watch every so often, but most movies--even great ones--I normally only see once in the theater.  I do love movie nights with friends, though.

4.  I'm afraid of heights.

5.  I don't play video games.  It's my favorite genre of music, and I love the storylines, but I leave the playing to other people.  I do, however, make exceptions for party games like Guitar Hero or Mario Kart.

6.  I was on the debate team in high school.

7.  As a child, my earliest career aspiration was to be a scientist.

8.  Though I love to travel, and try to go as frequently as I can, I am prone to homesickness.

9.  After Pokémon cards were banned at my elementary school, I helped establish and participated in an elaborate underground Pokémon card-trading ring.  I can't speak for the rest of the group, but I was never caught. 

10.  My driving record is spotless.

Round Two: FIGHT!

You don't have to watch any more of the video after you're four seconds into it.  It was just the only one I could find that had the right sound bite.

For some reason this is my favorite thing to say after my break at work.  Just about every day, after I've eaten my granola bars and refilled my water bottle, and as the buzzers are sounding to get moving again, someone will hear from me, "Round Two: FIGHT!"

Not sure why I like it so much; I'm not even a Mortal Kombat person.  But it's one of those little things that gets me through the shift. 

Well, it's time for Round Two on this here blog.  I've had a few people ask whether I would post again.  I kind of let it die, mostly on purpose.  This was for a number of reasons, but among the greatest was simply that I felt I had reached my goal in running the blog, and didn't have much else to add to it that wasn't already there. 

Which brings up another work analogy (don't you just love them?  I'm there every day, so I could come up with more!).  Most of my job involves building walls of packages inside trailers.  Each wall must be built to certain specifications: not too narrow, not too wide, tight from one side of the trailer to the other, reaching the ceiling, with the weight of the boxes and bags distributed in such a way as to prevent content damage or wall collapse.  It sounds more complicated than it really is, but there is a learning curve. 

The most difficult part of the wall for me to build is the very top.  It's not a matter of reach; I have a stool that solves that problem just fine.  Nor is it a matter of weight; heavy boxes don't go up there.  No, my problem comes from being too close.  When I'm on that stool placing things as high as I think they'll go, my perspective changes.  Eventually, because I'm essentially hugging it, all I can see is the surface of the wall.  More often than not, there's a little bit of space left just before hitting the ceiling, but I can't see it until I've gotten off the stool and backed up some distance.  So, sometimes I end up leaving a gap.

Life can be like that.  Many of us just get too close.  We get passionate about something, we get involved, we get in deep, and that's okay--but there is value in getting off the stool and backing up every once in a while, lest we leave gaps in important places.

I think this blog has been one example.  My purpose at the outset was to highlight the positive things in life: the reasons why the glass truly is half full.  Over time, however, it became crowded with things--good things--that didn't necessarily work toward what I wanted the blog to accomplish.  Blogging turned into "blogging for the sake of blogging."  I became a wall-hugger. 

So I put it away for a while.

Well, some have shown interest in a blog revival, and I'm stuck waiting for my laundry to finish because I really need something clean to wear after work tomorrow.  At 1:30 in the morning, I'm sure there are lots of people blogging.  It just seems like the thing to do. 

Of course, the same impulsive mind that kept finding things to do other than laundry is also the one that suddenly decided to write something tonight.  In other words, I had no idea until maybe an hour ago that I would be doing this.  So, I haven't had a chance to consider what changes will be made to the blog, other than the fact that they should be made. 

Thus far, however, it's safe to assume I won't be posting more than once, maybe twice a week.  I'm thinking a once-a-week type of deal would be best, so that I'm not exhausting my supply of meaningful thoughts and falling into redundancy.  Yeah . . . I like the idea of just writing about what my general theme was for the week, or something.  Those kinds of thoughts would have some real meat. 

But I'll think about that later, because the spin cycle is done.